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BULLYING has evolved. Today, it is less visible, more psychological and often more damaging.

Bullying is about power. It is rarely about physical strength alone. Crucially, not all bruises are visible.

The most painful form of bullying is often emotional and relational.

It includes constant criticism that erodes self-worth, the silent treatment used as punishment, public humiliation disguised as jokes, exclusion from meetings or social circles, spreading rumours and repeated intimidation that leaves a person anxious and fearful.

Victims begin to question their own value, abilities and even their sanity. This form of bullying exists everywhere. It happens in schools, universities, workplaces, homes and online.

The common denominator is not age or setting — it is the misuse of power. In Malaysia, we have witnessed students being mocked repeatedly until they dread going to school.

We hear of young professionals resigning because of toxic workplace cultures where humiliation is normalised in the name of discipline or performance.

We know of domestic relationships where one partner constantly belittles, threatens, humiliates, controls finances, or isolates the other from family and friends.

Social media has also become a platform where cyberbullying, public shaming, and character assassination spread rapidly, often without accountability.

Victims often carry their emotional pain in silence.

They suppress fear, anger, shame, and helplessness because they worry they will not be believed or face consequences for speaking out.

A teacher notices a child being isolated but assumes it is "children being children".

Colleagues watch a staff member being humiliated by a superior but avoid speaking up for fear of becoming the next target.

Family members know that emotional abuse is happening behind closed doors but dismiss it as "a private family matter". Friends witness cyberbullying yet scroll past.

Over time, these unexpressed emotions accumulate. The emotional discomfort becomes overwhelming.

Perhaps the greatest concern is not that bullying exists, but that we have become accustomed to it.

We witness it, we hear about it, and we recognise it — yet we remain silent.

Silence allows bullying to grow. Every ignored incident sends a message that such behaviour is acceptable.

Every bystander who chooses not to act unintentionally strengthens a culture of intimidation.

If we carry unresolved emotional wounds, struggle with negative emotions, or face repeated conflicts in our relationships, we should have the courage to seek help.

Addressing the root causes of our emotional pain is not a sign of weakness; it is an act of responsibility.

Left unaddressed, these issues can become ingrained in our character, shaping the way we think, relate to others and respond to life's challenges.

Over time, they may impair our relationships, decision-making, and overall psychological well-being.

Healing is not only for our own benefit — it also prevents our pain from becoming someone else's burden.

Creating psychologically safe environments is therefore everyone's responsibility.

Parents must model respectful communication at home. Schools should teach empathy, emotional regulation, and conflict resolution alongside academic excellence.

Employers must cultivate workplaces where respect, dignity, and accountability are non-negotiable. Community leaders, religious institutions, and policymakers should continue promoting awareness while ensuring that support systems are accessible and trusted.

Ultimately, true strength is not measured by how much power we have over others, but by how well we manage ourselves.

I do not need another victim to become a hero.

Real heroes empower rather than intimidate. They protect rather than exploit. They choose compassion over control and courage over silence.

If we want to build a healthier Malaysia, we must stop treating bullying as someone else's problem.

It begins with recognising the problem, refusing to normalise it, and having the courage to act before silence claims another victim.

Assoc Prof Dr Haniza Rais

Malaysian Board of Counsellors

The views expressed here are the views of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of the Daily Express. If you have something to share, write to us at: [email protected]